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Dramatis Personae

Sir Pellandres the Proud, as played by Adrian
Sir Guy the Cruel, as played by Scott
Sir Carabad, as played by James


In which our knights fight their greatest battle ever… against poverty.

The Pentacost feast at Earl Robert's court found Sir Guy and Sir Carabad in dire straights. Whereas Sir Pellandres' manor was fruitful and rich, their manors were beset by locusts. Their crops had failed, thus leaving them in the most dire of economic straights. Their horses had died, their armor was riddled with rust, their clothes were moth-eaten, and their peasants were gaunt and listless.

Thusly Sir Guy's and Sir Carabad's primary concern was the worldly accumulation of material goods. Thankfully Earl Robert required men to represent him at the wedding at King Arthur and Queen Guenever — kingly gifts and tournament winnings — and to quell the rebels in Malahaut — plunder and ransoms. The knights decided that the wedding was the greater path to riches, whereas Sir Pellandres the Proud saw it as a grand opportunity to show off his knightly prowess.


In which our brave knights go shopping for new clothes.

Upon realizing that their moth-eaten tunics were inappropriate attire for a royal wedding, Sir Guy and Sir Carabad concocted a scheme to replentish their wardrobe: they would joust knights at the crossroads for their armor. They found an appropriate bridge and set-up camp in wait.

On the first day, Sir Laern of Silchester rode forth and met Sir Carabad with much good-spirit. Although he was more inclined to share a jug of mead with the young knight than fight in the hot sun, they eventually agreed to terms. The two knights charged forward with lances in hand, but due to some sort of faerie mischief (or perhaps Sir Laern's penchant for drink), the two horses collided with a thunderous crash, sending both men sprawling. They vowed never to speak of this again and spent the rest of the afternoon becoming the bestest of friends.

On the second day, Sir Guy challenged Sir Moriot of Cameliard, who demanded one-year's service from Sir Guy should he succeed in unhorsing the upstart knight. Sir Guy, with little to lose, agreed, and the two rode forth with a terrible clash. Sir Moriot flew from the saddle, and with much sadness relinquished his armor and his charger, the mighty Vanquisher.

On the third day, Sir Pellandres decided to participate in his fellows' glory and challenged the next man to cross the bridge. By happenstance, it was mighty Sir Lamorak de Gales, son of Sir Pellinore. The two fought for the love of King Arthur with blunted swords, for which Sir Pellandres was victor. Sir Lamorak left in good spirits and promised that the two would meet again on the tournament field.

Thus outfitted with friendship, splendor, and glory, our heroes rode forth to Carlion.


In which royal gifts are distributed and Sir Guy takes a spear into his neck.

The knights attend the royal wedding ceremony, which was most splendid. Indeed, the mere sight of Guenever caused their knees to weaken. This inspired Sir Guy to ask the Queen for her favor at the upcoming tournament. Although taken aback by such a bold request, she agreed on the condition that he must excel in the joust.

Sir Pellandres begged that his gift be given to his impoverished friend, Sir Carabad. Impressed by the young knight's generosity, King Arthur agreed. Sir Carabad, vexed by the economic status of his manor, begged the king for help in getting his affairs in order. Arthur offered the impoverished knight the use of his seneschal, Sir Kay, for the following year. Sir Kay was less than interested in the ordeal, especially upon hearing of Sir Carabad's theory about the economic importance of bears.

As the three knights departed, Queen Guenever gave Sir Pellandres a sack of silver for being a paragon of knightly virtue. Soon afterward, Sir Tor was knighted by King Arthur.

The following day, the knights take part in the joust. Sir Guy proudly rode into the tournament circle with the anticipation of impressing the queen, but took a jousting lance into his neck instead. With much spurting of blood, he is dragged from the field in a wheelbarrow.

Sir Pellandres faired little better and was struck down in the third round. Sir Carabad, the poorest of knights, did the best out of the Salisburian delegation and made it into the fourth round before being unhorsed by a Cumbrian knight.

That evening, Sir Carabad was sorely tempted by a chance to buy a piece of the True Cross, but refused so as not to offend his friend, Sir Pellandres, by making a frivolous purchase so soon after the earlier display of generosity.

At dinner, Sir Pellandres' squire told the story of how his master defeated Sir Lamorak de Gales in single combat. Outraged by Sir Pellandres' lack of modesty, Sir Lamorak challenged him to a rematch.

The knights also beheld the first Spectacle of King Arthur's court. Sir Gawaine, Sir Tor, and Sir Pellinore were sent on a series of quests.


In which Sir Pellandres fights against Sir Lamorak before fighting on his behalf.

Sir Pellandres and Sir Lamorak meet on the field in single combat, only this time the arena was thronged with spectators. In a turn of play, Sir Lamorak quickly struck Pellandres down, thus reaffirming his love of the king.

At dinner that evening, Sir Pellandres was approached by Sir Agravaine of Orkney, who lamented Pellandres' most complete humiliation on the field of battle and propsed that the two knights become comrades-in-arms and give the proud son of Sir Pellinore a sound thrashing… or stabbing. Sir Pellandres refused and, in front of the entire feast, declared the young Agravaine a most unseemly knight. Agravaine, with much wroth, issued a challenge to duel to first blood.

And so, before King Arthur, Queen Guenevere, Sir Lamorak, Sir Gawaine, Sir Carabad, Sir Guy in his wheelbarrow, and countless others, the two knights fought. Both inspired by their honor, they came together in a thunderous clash of swords. Sir Agaravaine struck a slight blow on Pellandres' cheek, but declared that the wound was "not enough blood." In their third pass, Agravaine stabbed Pellandres most savagely through the leg. He mocked the wounded knight as he was dragged from the field.


In which our knights half-heartedly fight in the melee before returning to Salisbury.

And thus, our knights half-heartedly fought in the grand melee, but were ejected most swiftly. Most dejected, they returned to Salisbury wounded, exhausted, and as poor as when the left, but with much glory.

Other notes:

In the winter phase, Sir Carabad's sister married Sir Uwain (Doug's character). The following winter, she was dead. It is rumored that Sir Uwain smothered her with a pillow.

Despite his royal decree, Sir Kay took little interest in Sir Carabad's manor, but it did increase status from impoverished to merely poor. A hearty feast of parsnips and gruel was prepared in celebration.

Sir Guy, on the other hand, married well and increased his holdings to two manors. He became a superlative knight and fathered twins. However, his aunt was accused of stealing horses and is currently being held in a cell in Levcomagus.

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